Author Archives: mary

Writing and Health Balance

The Writing Life 2 Comments

Write.  Write every day.  Write to meet your goals.

These are good rules.  In 99% of cases I fully endorse these rules.  But like most rules, there is an exception, and here it is:

Do not sacrifice your health to write.

I learned this the hard way.  I set a writing goal and was hell-bent on making that word count.  My real life was very busy, so I cut some corners to meet my goals:  I stayed up late.  Woke up early.  Quit hiking and biking and all those non-writing activities.  Ate a lot of prepackaged, instant food to avoid wasting time cooking.  I got 2/3 of the way to my goal.

Then I got catastrophically sick.

About five weeks later, I was able to get back on the computer again.

Looking back, it really wasn’t a surprise.  I was eating garbage, much of which contained foods I know make me sick.  I wasn’t exercising, because even going for a walk was “a waste of time when you could be writing.”  In order to meet my goals, I was cutting down on my sleep and substituting coffee.  The end result?  I ruined my health, leaving my body with no reserves to protect it against illness.  Over the long term, I was less productive.

Take a good hard look and be honest with yourself.  A lot of us have bad habits where we skimp on writing time to watch TV or play video games or otherwise goof off.  Some of us, though, never watch TV or video games, because we’re too busy pushing ourselves towards our goal at every waking moment.  If you never have downtime to relax and recharge, you’ll end up in trouble.  You’ll probably be more successful in the short term than the person who does little–and then you’ll burn out, and fade away.

Make sure your desk chair and keyboard are set up in a way that won’t cause long term muscle strain.  Look away from the screen every ten minutes to prevent eye strain.  Most writers log a lot of hours at their computers, and repetitive stress injuries can leave you out of action for a long time.  One of my resolutions this year is to visit my massage therapist on a more regular basis, not wait until I have pain keeping me up all night.  If you do get an injury, give yourself the time to rest and recover, rather than compounding the damage by writing through the pain.

Similarly, if you’re too sick to read or watch TV, you’re probably too sick to write.  Don’t drag your laptop into bed to try to meet that quota; you’ll only prolong your illness if you don’t take proper care of yourself.  Don’t lace yourself up with painkillers to do something your body is trying to warn you will damage it further.  Rest, recover, and pick up where you left off once you’re feeling healthy.   If you don’t take care of the body which you inhabit, you won’t be able to write for as long as you probably want to.

If you feel that you spend too much time cooking, there are other solutions than eating instant meals each night.  Make double portions in your crock-pot, casserole, or wok; then you will have leftovers that you can keep in the fridge for later in the week, or freeze for a fast meal down the road.  Pre-bagged coleslaw is usually more expensive than a head of cabbage but for me it’s worth it for the time I save shredding that cabbage by hand.  The time I spent online looking for healthy recipes that I can prepare in half an hour or less has been more than worth it, knowing that I no longer have to calculate 60 minutes or more to make a nutritious dinner.

Sleep and exercise are not optional activities.  If you aren’t properly rested, you won’t be functioning at your best.  If you don’t exercise, your endurance will go into the toilet, and you’ll wear yourself out just getting around your apartment.  Your body is a critical part of your writing toolbox; you need to maintain it.

We’ve all stayed up late to meet a deadline or finish a project, but living in a permanent high-stress environment will ruin your health long-term.  When you’re calculating your goals, make sure you’re allowing yourself enough time to sleep adequately, eat healthily, exercise regularly, relax occasionally, and recover from unexpected illnesses or injuries.  Taking proper care of yourself will help ensure that your writing career will span decades, not just years.

Your Book–As A Gift

The Writing Life No Comments

This holiday season has been a first for me:  the first time I had neatly-stacked anthologies with my name on the back cover under my tree.  There I sat with a pile of Dark Bits on one side of me and Steamed Up on the other side as I wrapped presents for family and friends.

My parents and parents-in-law were an easy buy this year.  I autographed copies of Dark Bits to my dad and father in law, and Steamed Up to my mom and mother-in-law.  A copy of each went into my parcel to my best friend.  I was so proud to be able to put paper copies in their hands in thanks for their support and encouragement for all this time.  In fact, I couldn’t wait to go home and show everyone my books.

I was in the process of autographing a copy of Dark Bits to my grade school friend when I realized I had to be careful here.  These were books I’d purchased (at the author discount, but still, purchased by me).  Purchased to sell at conventions and to people I met.  If I gave them all as gifts, I’d be out a good chunk of change, and I’d have to save up and make another order before I’d have hard copies to sell again.

I believe my books are good reading, and I can’t afford to just give them all away.

So I took another look at my holiday list, and my stacks of books, and resisted the urge to sign a book to everyone I knew.

I now have a book-gifting policy:

1.  I will gift books to friends for whom I would ordinarily buy a present, in place of that present, if I feel they would genuinely like the book.  No money lost, as I’d have bought them a gift anyway.  Some of my friends aren’t readers, and that’s okay–I’ll buy them something else.

2.  I will gift books to friends who want to read my stuff and can’t afford to buy it.  I remain, to this day, dazzled by the generosity of a friend of mine who mailed me a copy of her latest hardcover, for free, shortly after its release date, because she knew I was out of work and tight on money.  She could have waited for me to get a job; she didn’t.  I’m paying this forward.

3.  I will gift books to my parents, my parents-in-law and my best friend, for being my closest supporters.

For everyone else, my friends and extended family members, I’m happy to sell them a book.

I felt more than a little anxiety going home for the family celebration with copies of my books in hand to sell.  On one hand, I’d written those stories and purchased those sale copies; I deserved to see some profit in exchange for my labour.  On the other hand, I was afraid I’d sound greedy, or naggy, or selfish.  I vowed that  I wouldn’t pester anyone, but I reminded myself that it isn’t reasonable for anyone to expect copies for free.  People who were willing and able to support me, and interested in my stories, would do so with a book purchase.  I was very pleased by how many of my cousins and friends offered to buy copies–who were willing to support me with a purchase, rather than expecting a book for free.  My anxieties had been for nothing.

One of the greatest gifts a writer can receive is the support of a book purchase, and I’d like to thank everyone who’s been willing to give this gift to me.

 

 

The Friends Who Stayed

The Writing Life 3 Comments

“If you don’t need to be a writer, don’t.”  I’ve heard this advice and found more than a little merit in it:  writing as a career involves long hours, hard work, constant uncertainty, and sometimes worse.

Sometimes, it hurts.

When I went to Superstars in 2010, having come to a point in my life where I no longer found fanfiction fulfilling and hoped to create and sell original stories, I was working a night-shift security job, 11 pm to 6 am.  My duties were simple:  assist customers who needed help, answer the phone, and tour the building once an hour.  The rest of the time?  Do what you like, as long as it’s quiet and keeps you awake.

Writing fit the bill.  So did role-playing, and social media, and chatting online, and all sorts of other things.  I had time to burn, time in which I got paid, wrote thousands of words each night, had an active online social life, and still had family time on my off hours.

This whole scenario changed when I took up an office management job.  Suddenly, every hour of my workday was spent…doing work.  I no longer had long swaths of paid time when I had nothing else to do.   Suddenly, writing and socializing were in direct competition with family time and housework.

Suddenly, sacrifices had to be made.

I didn’t want to be a hobby writer.  I didn’t want to be that person who only writes when he feels like it, or who puts writing at the bottom of her to-do list and wonders why she never gets around to it.  I had to carve out dedicated writing time to focus on my goals.  That meant I had a lot less time for role playing and marathon video-game sessions and movie-watching parties and fandom.

Yes, I lost friends.

Friends who felt I wasn’t giving enough to the friendship.  Friends who complained that I wasn’t available enough, that I was too hard to get ahold of.  Friends who thought I wasn’t any fun any more.  Friends who didn’t understand when six-hour visits turned to one-hour visits.

There was a point when I was on the verge of asking myself whether writing as a career choice was worth it.  Maybe I should do what other people did, work my 9-5 and let my evenings and weekends be my own.  Maybe I should be a hobby writer, get my friends back and spend my spare time hanging out and chilling out.  Was it worth being a writer if I lost touch with everyone I cared about?

Then I made a list of who stayed.

My husband stayed.  My best friend stayed.  Several of my online role-playing friends stayed, telling me that “no game was more important than real life” and that they supported me.  We’d play more slowly, that was all, posting every few days instead of multiple times a day.

A former co-worker and some local friends stayed, telling me that yes, they absolutely understood that I had a previous writing commitment when I couldn’t accept a last-minute invitation or declined to attend an event.  And no, they didn’t stop inviting me to things.  They just understood when I had to say no.  It wasn’t about me not liking them any more, or losing my previous interests, or “getting an attitude.”  It was about me having a job, just like they did.  A job that sometimes has to come before fun.

When I looked at the list of people who stayed, I realized that I wasn’t driving away the most important people in my life.

I still miss some of the friendships and good times that my writing career has cost me, but I know that I still have the people who care about me and support me.

This Yule Solstice, I’m thankful for the people who stayed.  For the friends who stood by me when writing became a job, not a hobby.  For the people who understand when I have to put in the long hours.  You are the reason this need of mine hasn’t cost me everything else I care about.  Your understanding–and support–is my greatest gift.

 

Networking: Friends with Benefits

Conventions Mary Pletsch The Writing Life No Comments

In October during Marketing and Promotion month, we had a great post on networking by Kim May. There’s a lot of great advice here on how networking can help you reach and connect with your readers.

This month, I’d like to focus on how to network with industry professionals.

Few of us are lucky enough to have people in the entertainment industry – and yes, writing and publishing are part of the entertainment industry – as part of our circle of family and friends growing up, but it is possible.  Ironically, one of my friends-who-is-also-a-published-author started out as the roommate of another friend I met through my toy collecting hobby.  Looking back, I laugh at some of our earlier meetings when neither of us had any idea of the other’s interest in writing.

But let’s assume you don’t have a contact like that.  I didn’t for many years.  How do you meet people who are working where you would like to be someday?

You can read blogs, join newsgroups, “like” Facebook pages, and/or follow Twitter feeds.  The best part about these venues is that even if you live in an isolated rural area, and can’t afford to travel, as long as you have Internet access, you’ve got all you need.

First, reading blogs etc will give you a feel for what it’s like to work as a professional writer / in the entertainment industry.  You may find it’s not for you.  Or, when you reach that point yourself, you will have some idea of what to expect.  I’m eternally grateful for the advice from a writer, who is now also a friend, who put on her blog the importance of turning around correspondence for publishers as quickly as possible.  They’re people too, they’re on deadlines too, and keeping them waiting and wondering if they are going to hear from you or not is an undesirable situation.   As someone who used to submit things on the day they were due–and never before–I realized that holding on to my finished submission until the due date wasn’t doing me any favours.  And I would never have realized that without this advice.  It’s invaluable, and it’s free.

Comment when you have something useful to say.  Over time, people will recognize your name and, if applicable, your avatar.  Remember, though, that reputations can be bad as well as good – keep the drama off someone else’s site, or you will be remembered for all the wrong reasons.

Conventions, seminars, launch parties and book signings are great in-person venues if you’re lucky enough to be able to travel or live near a city.  Authors and editors will give panels, readings, room parties, and book signings.  Attending panels and readings gives you conversation starters when you go to the parties and signings:  introduce yourself by name, then ask a question, comment on something, or give constructive feedback.  Don’t hog the person’s time – they’ll be meeting a lot of other people at the event.  At subsequent events, you can then re-introduce yourself (“we met at Ad Astra this past April”, “I came to your book signing last year in Toronto.”)  Faces become familiar very quickly.  And I’d be amiss if I didn’t mention Superstars Writing Seminars, where I received great advice from professional writers and also met a number of fellow newcomers just starting out in the field.  Look how far we’ve all come!

I’m very fortunate to have a friend who is a New York Times bestselling author–the person who first recommended Superstars to me, despite not being part of it herself.  It was her assurance that Superstars was worth the money and time that got me here today.  I’m not going to drop her name here, because the purpose of this post is not me showing off how special I am because of who I know.  I mention it to illustrate that unfortunately, the following paragraph contains advice that still needs to be shared:

Don’t expect professional authors to become your new best friends.  They’re busy people, on lots of deadlines.  They have private lives they aren’t going to share with people they’ve just met.  They are not going to drop everything to reply to you immediately, and they don’t owe you anything.  Be courteous, be respectful, be appreciative, and be professional.  These writers are active online and at conventions to connect with their audience and, if they are generous and have time, to share some insight on their profession.  You will not become friends with everyone you say hello to, and you will not stay friends (or even acquaintances) if your sole purpose of communicating is to “get stuff,” whether that “stuff” be attention, information, free swag, or “awesome inside sources”.   Treat industry professionals as people, not as means to your goals.

When you are at conventions, do attend public events (book signings, autograph sessions, panels, public room parties and launch parties).  Do not try to crash private functions (ie author-only parties), follow people into the restroom to strike up conversations, or loiter outside people’s hotel suites waiting to pounce on them.  As on the Internet, being loud, drunk, promiscuous, smelly, obnoxiously persistent or rude gives you the wrong reputation very quickly.  And remember that alcohol makes all sorts of things seem like A Good Idea At The Time.

As someone who rarely drinks alcohol in public I strongly recommend a glass of pop, soda or juice carried around a room party or nursed at a convention bar if you are a non-drinker or if you have reached your drinking limit.  People will think it is a drink (thereby saving yourself the need to constantly turn down offers of drinks) and you will both appear sociable and remain in control of how you are presenting yourself.  (I also note that if you are a non-drinker, after seven or eight Dr Peppers you will feel like bugs are crawling all over you, so go easy on the caffeine-as-alcohol-substitute.  Lessons from Ad Astra 2013–bad decisions made so you don’t have to!)

The best thing about networking is that it builds its own momentum.  Once you know one person, they will introduce you to other people.  Soon you’ll find yourself in contact with all kinds of people who are working in, or working towards, your chosen profession.