Sergeant Johnson didn’t fear combat drops anymore. He pressed the button and entered freefall. Ten jumps, and him the last survivor of his class. Groundside, everything was blood and lead, but in freefall there was…freedom. The retros fired, his capsule released him, and the parachute would have taken over. If, this time, he wore one.
Category Archives: The Writing Life
Fish Magic
Double Nickels
This is my first article as a Fictorian, and it’s a stretch for me. People who know me are aware that I tend to be, shall we say, overly appreciative of sesquipedalian verbage. To be concise, it’s hard for me to be concise.
Writing a short story in itself is a challenge for me. Shrinking one down to 55 words is more like an inquisition.
But it was fun. Here are two attempts to pull this challenge off. Hope you like them. Or one of them at least:
The Fish
A gentle tug, then a yank.
Startled from a daydream, reflex takes over, and I knock over my beer as I jerk back on the pole.
“You got one?” Bob asks, jealousy in his tone.
I crank the reel. Nothing. It got away.
“No,” I reply. “But I had one.”
“Sure you did.” Bob smirks.
Alchemy
The alchemist toils behind his table.
Glass against glass, the gurgle of tinctures and potions. The power comes as much from the delicate twist and shake of the decanter, as from the elixir contained within.
I wait, licking my lips in anticipation as the concoction bubbles.
The alchemist presents it.
Ah… bourbon and coke.
Magic.
Cinnamon Toast on Mars
This was so much fun! I’ve written flash fiction before but never at precisely 55 words.
I must admit, I was daunted, But, I was determined to do it. Why?
Because I remember Kevin J. Anderson saying that when he started out in his writing career, he never turned down an assignment. Now, I live by those words, even when starting a task I’m not sure about. As writers, we have the best job in the world, one which feeds our imagination and intellect, and keeps us as amazed as a kid pressing her face against the candy store window. Research, thought, and writing the article or prose – that must always be our mantra.
So, here is my first ever double nickel:
“Cinnamon toast on Mars, that’s my third wish.”
“Really?”
“Yes. I always wanted to experience Martian Bob’s café.”
The genie waved his arms and cinnamon toast smells envelope me.
“Cinnamon toast for table three,” someone says.
Frescoes swirl on walls and ceiling, and windows flash Martian vistas.
“Your order, ma’am.”
Spikey blue tendrils grab me.
Now, my writing friends, it’s your turn!
55 WPM
The Story:
55 wpm
Khalid I love you that’s the most important thing whatever happens remember I LOVE YOU. Not much time, I don’t know who the hijackers are or what they want…Khalid I would rather tell you you’d be proud of me for my typing test today. I can type 55 words per minute with no errors at
The Article:
I think my experience as a short story writer is probably a common one in that over time, stories tend to sort themselves into three categories.
You’ve got your Bulls-Eyes. You see a call for submissions, you have a great idea, you write it and it works, you send it in, and the editors love it and snap it up. One and done. This was the case with my flash fiction “The Long Haul,” which got published in the Dark Bits anthology.
You’ve got your Wanderers. Sometimes these stories get written because you want to tell them, and not in response to a particular call. Other times, you write them for a specific call and they don’t get accepted. Either way, you’ve now found yourself with a “homeless” story that needs to find a place to belong. Sometimes you’ll get lucky and you’ll stumble across a call for submissions that suits what you’ve got. Or maybe this story will find a home in a magazine or anthology that accepts stories on a wide variety of subject matter and themes. You’ll rework and rewrite and send it out again. Sometimes you’ll have the delightful experience of watching a story that’s been rejected several times finally find a home…sometimes even in a market that pays double, or triple, that of the markets that rejected it. The time I invested in revising that story definitely paid off.
And you’ve got your One-Winged Birds. These stories have flaws that keep causing them to be sent back to you time and time again. I’ve got a few of these now which are starting to feel like time sinks, and I think that I’m better served writing something new than spending any more time rewriting old material. There’s always a balance to be struck between rewrites to make something better, and accepting that a certain concept is just not working, and eating up time better spent creating something new.
One of my one-winged birds is a political story which, I’ve been told, is too much of the characters discussing/debating/arguing and not enough action. I think the debate is exciting, but I’m apparently the only one.
55 wpm is another.
I’ve sent out several versions of “WPM” (word number varying depending on story length…) and gotten some very mixed feedback. I think this is the only story where I’ve ever been told that the stakes are “too high” and I should “write smaller”–from a reader who found the hijacking scenario too over-the-top to be able to suspend disbelief. (A vast majority of critiques suggest that authors make the stakes higher!) Other feedback suggested that the stakes were great –tense, urgent, exciting–but the main character’s responses too banal, surely? All I could think in response to that was my own responses to emergency situations–including an in-flight emergency as pilot in command–were, after the fact, hilariously banal. This might be the reason for the markets who told me they found the story unintentionally humorous and rejected it on those grounds.
So, with some of my critique suggesting that I choose a less urgent scenario, and other critique advising me to make the main character’s response more “serious”, I’ve decided to call endex on any more revisions for this story. In a less urgent scenario, I couldn’t write the main character’s stream-of-consciousness reply, transcribing her thoughts as she thinks them, no matter how banal–because in a less urgent scenario, the main character would have time to consider her words and edit her typing. And a more “serious” response is completely at odds with the kind of things that crossed my mind in actual emergencies when I’d already done all I could do and was waiting to see if it would be enough.
The lessons I’ve taken away from this one are:
- I don’t think I want to write another hijacking story (except possibly as part of a longer thriller in which the hijacking would be a plot point and not the entire focus of the story). This tight focus on the hijacking event seems to be a very hard sell, partly because there’s a tricky line at which extreme emotion becomes over-the-top.
- I find this story frustrating because the stream-of-consciousness (banality and all) was inspired by my own mental response to an emergency situation. I wondered whether some of the people giving critique had ever been in a life-or-death emergency situation. But…they’re the editors and I’m not, so I can’t exactly argue with them that they’re wrong (Don’t argue with editors. It makes you look very unprofessional, and you won’t convince them to change their minds and accept your story. But it can definitely be galling.)
- This story’s based on a conceit: the protagonist’s typing speed precisely limits how many words she’s able to send to her partner before impact. Being “cute and clever” can backfire. Character and voice are far more important than showing off how clever you are; and there are some readers (and editors) who don’t like “clever twists”, no matter how well you do character and voice. I still like the story’s conceit, but I also like puns and stuff 😉 Going forward, I plan to focus on character and voice rather than thinking up new “sly twists” to base stories on.
About Mary: